When you don't have enough spoons
And how you can refill you well... of spoons.
Updates… again
Maycember hit a little early. I’ve been somewhat notably absent the last few weeks with end-of-year school activities for my kids, illnesses, and teacher appreciation week, as well as all of my kids joining Scouts (which is its new brand of craziness for our family). Of course, that means it’s likely everything for the next few months might be coming in waves. And… I’ll talk a bit more about it below. Just know, I’ve not abandoned this platform when I’m quiet.
Multi-genre Madness AND Quirky Fiction?
Two for the price of my sanity, I guess. Month ago me thought Hey, let sign up for lots of things and try to do this whole advertising thing…
Ridiculous past me.
But maybe not… Maybe it was the motivation I needed to get something out into the world again.
And maybe — just maybe — you’ll find a new freebie or book you’ll like.
Multi-genre Madness is full of free books, chapters, and more from authors who (like me) write in many genres.
And then there’s quirky fiction! These aren’t freebies but books for sale. My last release, Comics, Cons & Clerics, is part of this.
When you don’t have enough spoons…
Maybe you’re scratching your head… what do I mean by “not enough spoons?” The Spoon Theory is a metaphor that helps describe the limited amount of physical and mental energy each of us has to fulfill our daily tasks. The metaphor is that maybe you start out with 10 spoons each day. A daily task (for a neurotypical person) might take one spoon. So with 10 spoons, you could (in this hypothetical situation) get 10 tasks done. When they are done, your energy is spent. (Many neurodivergent groups have picked up the theory to liken to their daily experiences that a neurotypical person might use only one spoon per activity but maybe someone with ADHD it takes five spoons because it requires a lot of executive function that they do not always have).
In life, we carry a lot of load. There are daily tasks for taking care of ourselves and our family, maintaining whatever kind of household we live in, working, etc. Being creative, in and of itself, is also taking up spoons.
Like I said all the way at the top, lately life has been ultra crazy. The spoons I would have used on a daily basis for writing have needed to shift to school activities, worrying about and preparing for meetings, and more. The creative well and its spoons ran dry because my spoons were all used up for other things. (Even as I write this, I’m still so exhausted and know I have stuff that is not writing-related tomorrow, as it takes a backseat once again in the spoon priority line…).
Daily spoon refilling can be hard, especially when a person is constantly running out of spoons (aka burnt the heck out). So, what do you do? How do you refill your spoons then?
Obviously, the answer is different for everyone. It will always depend on what you have going on, what time you can manage for yourself, and so on. Maybe it’s watching a comfort show (or if you have the spoons for a new show, try that, but when I talked about comfort characters… I talked about how that can take energy as well). Maybe it’s getting out for a walk in nature, reading a book, doing something different that’s creative.
Maybe it’s sleep.
I know for me, personally, when I’m here at the burnout stage (as I really most certainly am at the moment), refilling my well can look drastically different day to day. Today, it is sitting down in a quiet (save for the 3d printer chugging along behind me) room and writing this blog article, but tomorrow it might be binge-watching anime before the weekend because the kids aren’t home. Refilling my well is sometimes not doing anything creative, but taking the family to a park or the zoo.
I think we get bogged down a bit in the “self-care” side of social media, which touts ways to treat burnout, usually with a commercial item.
Lately, one of the biggest things I did to start refilling my well more consistently was to say no. I stepped down from a big task I had been doing for years. There were not enough hours in the day between everything I was doing. Even if I’m resigned to not be a best-selling author, even the small amount of time I devoted to writing or selling was dwindling because of other obligations that no amount of scheduling could keep me sane from.
But how do you refill your spoon well? I think we should all talk about it more, share ideas, and support one another when we feel like we’re drowning in obligations.